I Love You, Hubby...

There is a beautiful moon in the sky tonight, accented by the stars.
She is as full as my love for you.
As bright as my pride is in you. Yet as far away from me as I physically feel from you.
On any night- no matter if I can see her fully or if she is partially shadowed.
No matter if the sky is generous in giving her an audience.
No matter if the sky's mood is a bit opaque.
No matter the distance she is from me.
That moon, she is there... shining over me.
Silvery luminescence teasingly close enough to touch, yet heartbreakingly intangible.
So perfectly complete, as is our love.
I mentally bask in her glow as it embraces me like your arms.
I can face sleep with alacrity as I know my dreams will be of you.
I smile on nights like this for there is a beautiful moon in the sky tonight and I am feeling loved.

Thoughts From the Inner Sanctum...

Just comparing this deployment to the last one...
Only 3 kids last deployment.
Worked on Saturdays at that time so I had Fridays off to do as I pleased while kids were at school. I made it to the beauty shop every two weeks. My hair got so long and healthy.
We were in an apartment. Paying about half what we pay now for rent. Our debt was a bit different. Only one car payment as well.
Hubby bought me a treadmill and I had time to get on it every single day. I lost so much weight. Bought so many cute clothes.
This time...
I have 6 kids. Daycare is taking a huge chunk out of our budget, along with the other debts.
I work Monday-Friday so it's hard to find free time away from the kids. And with so many little ones it's so hard to get everything done that I need to do. No time to work out. I feel like a fat blob. I have lost some weight but it's probably stress related.
I haven't been to the beauty shop but once. My hair looks like crap. I have had a couple of pedicures. I have been able to sneak away to the movies every now and then.
This is not a complaint. Just an observation. My goodness how times have changed.
I can also say that this deployment has been different emotionally. I have to deal with more personalities missing daddy. I have gotten so much more attached to my husband since last deployment in 2005-2006. So the pain is a bit greater than last time.
I don't have as much help as I did last time it seems. I rarely get phone calls from people just to check on me. I know everyone has their own lives, but I just feel totally isolated from everyone. Work is ok. It's getting out of the house. But these folks are in it for them for the most part.
On another note... I have been eating tons of ice lately. It's becoming an addiction. What's up with that? Big, huge, gigantic cups of it.
I got to Skype with my hubby for about 20 minutes on lunch at work today. That was nice. Luckily I brought leftover pizza from home from last night so I didn't have to go out for lunch. I was so happy to see his face and hear from him. Seems like we have been instant messaging forever.
I know I should be saying, "Only 2 more months(-ish)" and being really excited. But all I am thinking is, '2 more months of this sh*t'... And I am not excited. Wish my scales would tilt the other way.
Watched a really cute movie with C and L last night... Cirque Du Freak- the Vampire's Assistant. It was really cute. Wish I would've bought it. Still have time to catch it on sale. :)
I have been really tired lately. Getting a lot done, yet still falling behind... I really hate deployment. The only good thing I can say that will come out of it, I will get to know my hubby all over again...
And TGIF... I so need a couple of days off...

February 18-24... Let's play catch-up!

I was in such a good mood on Thursday, Feb. 18th. I got off work early. It was a beautiful sunny day. I had to leave early to meet the plumber to find out if the kids had flushed something again or what. Turned out they just had to snake the toilet. 79.50 and I was free for the rest of the day. Went to see the Wolfman movie. I was really excited about it from the previews. But I wasn't that impressed with the story. The graphics and scenery were amazing but it was kind of cheesy. The day went pretty well.

Friday, I was off work all together. Unpaid time off but I needed to take it. Took Bubba and Princess to the doctor in the AM. Turned out Bubba had ringworm. Said he could've picked it up from a shopping cart or anywhere and is contagious to the touch. But they have seen kids sleep in the same bed and not pass it to each other. So far, so good. Nobody else has it. Just have to chalk it up to snails and puppy dog tails, I guess. My only little boy. Princess had extremely dry skin on the back of her hands. I was concerned about diabetes or something that would make her skin feel like sandpaper and itch. Was told to put lotion without water in it on her hands. Was told to use an anti fungal cream for Bubba. Had been doing both... Wasted trip to doctor (cause now every thing's ok and I was already doing what she suggested) Oh well. Better safe than sorry, I guess.

Had a little bit of free time after their visit. So I took them to daycare and went to the movies. I saw Shutter Island. Wow. That was the strangest, twistiest, darkest movie I have seen in a while. I love Martin Scorsese normally and usually am impressed by Leo DiCaprio. They did a great job. Got out just in time to pick up all four little ones from daycare and take them to the dentist. They did a great job while in his chair but the waiting room was a suicide mission! They all checked out with no cavities or problems and are nice and clean now. Good job, Mommy.

Dropped kids back off at daycare for a bit. Went back home for some chores. Then picked them up again and went on with my nightly routine, including watching more 24. OMG! I am loving that show.

Saturday, the major exciting part of the day was the birthday party Princess, Bruiser and Ellie bear went to. It was at Pump It Up. A place filled with bounce houses. They had fun. Got to see some old friends. I pretty much only see them at this little girls birthday party each year but I talk to them via text message and facebook all the time. It was nice to see them in person though. The rest of the day was all about cleaning. Cici stayed home with the twins. She thought she was too old to go. And the twins were definitely too small.

Sunday, I just couldn't take it. The kids were all underneath me so I broke down and called hubby's cousin and asked her to babysit and she was happy to do so, well her daughter. They stayed over there all day. Cici, Elliebear and I cleaned up some more and we took a break in between and went to Movie Tavern and saw Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief. It was a pretty good movie. They did a good job of keeping it PG-13 but making it entertaining for adults.
The food was kind of disappointing there. Wish we had've gone to the other movie/food place. But it was nice to spend some time away with the girls.

Monday, back to work. Ugh. It was such a long day. Nothing spectacular that I can remember.

Tuesday. Only had to work half a day. Took Cici to Ortho appointment in the afternoon. They still won't put her bands in. Had to make another appt for March 30, same day I go to get my teeth cleaned at least. She has to get another spacer put in for 2 weeks, then goes back on 04-06-10 to have bands put in. She has improved in her brushing but still can do better. I have to continue working with her on that one. It snowed again most of the day too. However, it didn't stick. Melted before it hit the ground. The little flurries sure were pretty though.

Wednesday... Payday. That time off work last week to meet the plumber and take kids to doc and dentist, really hurt my check. 11 hours unpaid. Ouch. But, we'll manage. I got to talk to the hubby here and there over the last few days. He seems to be in very good spirits. Thank goodness. There have been times where he sounded like he was on death row or something. Poor baby. Missing home as much as home is missing him.

I love you hubby! Cant wait to hold you in my loving arms!

No titles...

Well, we can start with just a recap.
On Saturday, my brother called to say he got volunteered to pick up some of his son's teammates. So he didn't take C and L to the basketball game.
I made it to the FRG meeting about 45 minutes late. But still got the pertinent info. Fund raisers, the welcome home party, etc. Still no dates as to when to expect the hubby. That stinks but I do appreciate how involved our FRG group is in trying to make this deployment go smoothly as well as the coming home.
I went shopping on base after the meeting. Got good deals on lots of stuff. I even shopped for me! Didn't make it to AW's birthday dinner. No sitter. Seems like they had fun though.
Sunday- Valentine's day. Took the kids out to eat at one of our favorite all you can eat grills. It was nice. I had to spend my day yelling at them to help me clean before we could go though so it wasn't a very peaceful or romantic day until the dinner.
We have been so busy at work this week. More of the overtime. More of the sick kids and sick mommie. More of the extremely tired. And someone has flushed something down the other toilet I think. So I had to take unpaid time off tomorrow to meet the plumber at my house again and have a clean out done. At least they told me if it's the same job as last time, they'd only charge me half price. That's good news.
We found out we are going to start taking West coast calls so we have mandatory training scheduled March 2-5, 40 hrs crammed into 4 days. And still have to work our regular tour on Monday. I'm so excited. (throw confetti and blow horn here)
I can say this. I have gotten some great letters and cards from the hubby. They have been great morale boosters. I know it's my imagination but I feel like I can count on one hand the number of people in this hemisphere who actually give a crap about me. And I have 6 kids at home, mind you. I just feel MAD!
I know the clock is ticking. I know the countdown is almost over. I am not finding comfort in that thought right now. I need to get the email or phone call saying "I'm home." I need to see hubby getting off the plane. I love you, sweetheart.

Frosty Friday...

Wow! It's snowed for over 24 hours. Luckily this AM the roads weren't so bad. I had to come to work and am trusting C and L at home with the little ones. So far, they seem to be doing ok, but I am still very worried about the 8 hours plus my drive time before I see them.
I have the worst headache today. Probably blood pressure. I feel tense too. But it's Friday! I so need these 2 days off, though the weekend will be busy as well.
The snow has been beautiful. Princess, Bruiser, L and I built a snowman in the front yard last night. It's goofy looking but I think they will never forget the experience. We don't get enough snow to do that! EVER! I took some pictures of the different lovely things that caught my eye. I am however upset that the patio table with the big umbrella got over weighted by the snow and tipped over and the glass broke. So now I get to clean glass out of the driveway. Also, we lost a lot of big limbs. So I will have to clean up the yard of tree debris too.
On Wednesday, I got a half dozen roses in a beautiful vase with baby's breath and little daisies mixed in for Valentine's Day at work. I got a camel in the mail the same day. Yes, a little stuffed camel. He's so cute. I can't wait to see what else Daddy has in store for me.
I have started season 3 of 24. Just on the first disc. I have slowed down a bit. Think I am getting worn out again. My brother wants to take C and L to see his son's basketball game on Saturday AM. There is supposed to be a FRG meeting at 1 PM on base. I need to go to base anyway- time to buy diapers- so I may go. And another Seabee wife is having a birthday dinner at Cheesecake Factory. I hope I can go.
I want to see a couple of movies that come out today too. Don't know if I will be able to fit those into my weekend. I have rented a couple of romantic comedies this week. It's getting easier to watch them. The sappy love stories that should make me feel good were depressing me before. But we are on the downhill slope! Yay! Closer to hubby. So I can watch and enjoy them now.
We had a meeting at work this week. If our attendance doesn't improve in the next 6 months, they are going to close our office. That's what we were told anyway. We do have a lot of people who call out, go on disability, etc. There is no where to transfer now, so we may not even have anywhere to be surplussed to. That sucks for those of us who go to work! But maybe that will just be the step I need to do nursing school full time.
Missing you Baby! We're almost halfway through February! Oh, that is good news!

This has been a pretty good Tuesday so far...

I am trying to do this early. I am at work on my break. I have been so busy and devoting my time to other things, I have failed to blog in like a week almost! Sorry, hubby!
I had a great weekend. On Saturday, I went with Elliebear to the convention center to see her accept a 1st place ribbon for the essay division in the kid's entrepreneur contest. She had a cute idea and entered in December. She did it all on her own and I felt bad because the whole time she was asking me to help her with it, I kept saying I didn't have time. It was optional. She did it all by herself and was recognized by the chamber of commerce for our city as well as the school district. What an amazing kid.
I was telling another friend of mine how she overwhelms me. She wants to take ice skating lessons, karate, singing lessons, and gymnastics. I signed her up for runner's club at school. They have finally gotten enough funds for the running track to be built so first part of March they have a free program after school sponsored by the gym teacher and a few other teachers. They will gear up for a 5k run on Saturday, April 17th. She joined fiddle club and also ran for student council. I did have to have the teacher conference. They told me how fond they were of L and were truly concerned about her being so sleepy during the day and it affecting her ability to pay attention in class. I cried during the meeting. I was so tired and trying to explain the length of our day to the teachers just depressed me. They really seemed concerned and want her to succeed and that I am thankful for. I have a great kid and she does need an attitude adjustment every now and then. But aren't most geniuses, success stories, and athletes kinda of anal? LOL.

I am having an excellent day sales wise at work. It's about time because since last Thursday, it's been crap! Friday I was so sick at work, I thought I was going to die, quite literally. Also, the daycare called and said Bubba had a fever. I am so tired of everyone being sick. I do feel better. I think we both had a serious 24 hour bug.
The twins have been promoted to the toddler room at daycare. Cici went to a dance on Friday night. Her 7th grade Valentine's Dance. She hung out with her girlfriends and they seemed to have fun. Bruiser is getting so smart and talking so well and Princess is just being her own crazy self. All the kids seem to be doing pretty good considering.
On Sunday, my mom came over and watched the kids so I could go to TR's house to watch the Superbowl. They live in a newly developed area. Nice house. I had lots of fun with my Seabee sisters. It was great getting out of the house with adults again. There is so much coming up that I'd like to do with the FRG group. There is bowling on Friday night, but I won't have a sitter for the little ones. C & L could have gone to that one. There are also some get togethers amongst some of the wives I would like to attend but work and babysitting is getting in the way. I am just going to do what I can when I can. I have met some really great women as a part of this group!

I got a footlocker in the mail yesterday from the hubby. Filled with goodies. TShirts for me. Movies, CDs, snacks. Knitted hats for everyone. The kids were fighting over the hats last night but we all ended up with ones we liked. I love mail from the hubby. I can't wait to see what I get for Valentine's Day!
I have been totally caught up in the series 24. I rented the 1st and 2nd season from Blockbuster and have watched all but the last disc in the last 2 weekends. I have gotten a lot done while it was on but it totally takes my mind off the housework. It's a very fast paced and exciting show.

My hubby is enjoying the pics I took for him for V-DAY. I took exactly 21 poses and we have always, when he's home, done the 14 days of valentines where we give each other small gifts until actual Valentine's day, and then the big gift comes last. He started that and I love him. I wish he was actually here to spoil me with that! Anyway, it worked out to where I can send him 1 or 2 pics a day up until... So I alternate each day. I am so glad he likes them.
I am really missing the hubby. All the reminders of him not being here at Valentine's suck! Just have to keep telling myself it's almost over! It's almost over...

Humpday...

Man, I made it over the hump! I was so tired today, my body ached. Sitting in the chair in my cubicle all day. I had closed key time and I actually took a nap. It was the best 30 paid minutes of my life!

This evening, L had a field trip with her orchestra/music class. They went to see a musical called Thoroughly Modern Mollie at the local high school. It was supposed to be over at 8 and they rode the bus there from the school and ate pizza first. I got there at 7:50 and went in to pick her up and it was still going. It didn't end til 8:45. I ended up catching most of the second act. I really enjoyed it. There are some really talented kids at that school and I have always enjoyed their programs.
I put the twins to bed before going to pick up L. Cici stayed home with Princess and Bruiser. Bubba was not feeling well. Had a slight temp and threw up his dinner so I hope and pray he is ok tomorrow. There is no more vacation time available until next week. I have half a day off tomorrow. And I am actually excited about it. It's odd because the reason I am excited is that I actually get to catch up on my housework!
I finished the first season of 24 tonight. Oh my! It was good! I am going to start season 2 next. I also rented The Ugly Truth at hubby's recommendation. He said it was really funny. I need a good laugh. I washed 3 loads of clothes and did the dishes while watching TV. I tell you it makes the chores go by a bit faster, I believe. I mated socks! That's great fun, especially when the majority are itty bitty toddler socks! woo hoo!
I got to skype with hubby very briefly today before he went to work. I miss him so much and it was really good to see his face and hear his voice. He got to talk to Princess and Bruiser before they went to bed as well. They haven't talked to him in a while. Princess drew the cutest picture of hubby and I and told me to mail it to daddy for valentine's day. She's such a sweetie.
My friend Dana from work was finally deemed completely disabled, or enough so that he doesn't have to come to work anymore. He and his wife just celebrated their 26th anniversary. He was in the Army as a youngster and he was very supportive during this deployment. He checked on me via facebook and of course always asked about me and hubby and the kids while he was sitting next to me each day. He understands the difficulty of being separated from your family. And he is just a nice easy going guy. I feel bad for him. He was so outgoing and very active in the union and very genuine. And now I feel like he is going to just sit home and deteriorate. It makes you appreciate your good health and blessings, that's for sure.
Well, I need to get some sleep. Once again, I have failed to make it to bed before midnight. But I am extremely satisfied with what I accomplished this evening. If you are reading this hubby, I love you tremendously!

Another Month Down!!!

We have made it two days into February! This has been a tremendously busy time for me! On Saturday, I went to take pictures at the same place we used before for the SeaBee Wives Xmas photos. It was a long drive and I got lost. The lady moved her shop to a different location and man was it confusing. I ended up on a FM road to nowhere! But the photos came out nicely. I was pretty self conscious about them cause they are Valentine's Day pics for the hubby. Kinda risque, but I think he will like them. I am mailing him some but also sending him one or two a day until VALENTINE'S via email. That took most of my day on Saturday. It was nice seeing the couple of wives left by the time I got there. Every one's pics came out really cute. Some of them are super photogenic! I'm jealous!
Sunday was A L's baby shower. She and hubby are having a girl. It was really nice to see such a big turn out. She gave everyone little gift bags that have nail polish and foot cream, etc. in them. That was a sweet gesture. She cleaned up on diapers! That's awesome! I know how expensive that can get! There were games, good food, pictures, nice conversation. It was lovely to be out of the house and amongst adults for 2 days in a row. I almost felt like a sane person!
I am going to pay for the time away from the house though. I am still trying to get caught up on chores. I took off half a day on Thursday so I can take care of some business. I have so much to do. Not only cleaning but "paperwork" stuff. UGH!
My regular manager still hasn't come back to work since he and his wife had their preemie baby. So they replaced him with our attendance manager, Mike Thompson. UGH! He is a flaming idiot! He's the one who was gunning for me about that 3 minute tardy and put me on the disciplinary step at work. He says he won't bother us if we come to work and make our sales. I told him I didn't like for a manager to hover. He says he won't but he's always there! Stan used to tell us he doesn't micromanage. And you really wouldn't see him around. I hate to say it, but I wish he'd come back.
We have been sooo busy at work. I don't know what the deal is. At least 30 minutes mandatory overtime each day. We had an hour and a half on Monday. I am pooped! I haven't taken the time to blog lately. Sorry, hubby!
Lost had it's final season premiere episode tonight. I really want to watch it with my hubby so I scheduled the DVR to record the whole season and I am going to watch it with him when he comes home. We'll see if curiosity doesn't get the best of me! But I have plenty to do to keep my mind off of it. Most of the shows I watch on a regular basis, my hubby could care less about but he was actually kinda keeping up with Lost with me... It'll be something we can watch together so I am excited about that.
I bought Zombieland on DVD today. And I went to Blockbuster and rented the 5th disc from the 1st season of 24. That show has me totally hooked and I think they are on like season 7 or something now. So I have a long way to go!
Elliebear entered an Entrepreneur Kid's contest in December with her zip-chains idea. She was a semifinalist. She is getting an award on Saturday for it at 2 PM. I will be sure to take pictures. I had a parent teacher conference with her Math/Science and Reading teacher. They were concerned about her grades slipping a bit cause she keeps falling asleep in class. I tried to explain to them how long of a day L has and so much responsibility. However, some of the fault has to lie with L. I sometimes have to fight her about going to bed on time. Cici is struggling in math and Texas history. Both C and L have been assigned tutoring at school to help them. They are overall really good kids. I know they get tired and frustrated like I do sometimes though. I still don't know how I'd do this deployment thing without them.
The twins have been promoted to the toddler room and they are loving it. Princess and Bruiser are still enjoying daycare as well. They come home each day with arts and crafts and pictures. It's great! NAACRA sent their first check to help pay for day care. The owner was very impressed with how quickly they paid. So that was a blessing for sure.
Gonna try to get some sleep. Love you honey!