It's Christmas. We had freak snow. Snow that actually stuck to the ground. Never happens here. A white Christmas and hubby missed it. I am not too surprised that this seems like just another day. I feel tired and crabby.
I grabbed a few last minute gifts today. Found myself black pants, a black shirt and a new black purse. Got some flip flops for C and L for around the house. These tile floors can get cold with bare feet. I also got Princess and Bruiser "princess dresses," a pink Barbie one for Bruiser and a blue Cinderella one for Princess. I also got Bubba a pair of courdoroy pants and a sweater (from mother-in-law, she sent Princess and the frog outfits to the girls) I picked up the District 9 dvd. I filled up the gas tank and got the oil changed on the truck today. Pretty productive, I guess.
I left work at 9:45 AM. I know I am going to regret it, but if hubby says don't worry, momma won't worry. I know we'll be OK. I just get so worked up about stuff. And I still, as usual, feel like I didn't get anything accomplished. I got to Skype with hubby a bit ago for an hour. Yay! And the man finally set up a facebook account. I am still in shock! Were bringing him in to the new world bit by bit. Welcome, honey!
I have been reading all the merry Christmas posts on facebook today. I am still not feeling it. I am glad the time is passing so quickly. I can't wait to reunite with my husband and get reacquainted. I really want to be in the spirit. But I am just not. I know I am not the only one who feels this way. This holiday stuff just isn't the same when your family is incomplete. I could care less about the gifts. I just want this whole that is in my life to be filled. And my hubby is the only thing that can do it.
I must say, I am grateful for this in a way. I have made some new friends. I am showing my children how to be strong. They will be so much more prepared for life's hardships than others. They are taking this like little warriors, ready for battle. I told my husband I appreciated him today. Just in case I hadn't told him lately. He, and his military brothers and sisters are making the ultimate sacrifice. Though we are missing him, we still have the comforts of home. We have familiarity. We have each other. They have this new environment, new culture and new people to learn to live with. I can't even begin to imagine. I am grateful for the friends I have made along this journey. I am thankful to have them as a support system. I am thankful that I am able to provide a Christmas for my children, with my husband's support from afar, when so many others are unable to.
This time apart will never be regained. My hubby is missing out on so much. Our babies are growing up so fast and these moments are gone in the blink of an eye, it seems. It saddens me. I saw a bumper sticker today that said, "if you love your freedom, thank a vet." I know my freedom is worth the sacrifice. I know my children's freedom is worth it... that's the big picture. But is it really worth it? I tell you, for all this freedom, I feel pretty trapped...
Miss you like crazy, honey. I hope you have as Merry a Christmas as humanly possible. I love you and I am constantly thinking of you. Be safe and let's hurry up and get 'er done! I am ready for you to come home!
Friday, December 25, 2009
I can't believe it's here...
Posted by SeabeeWife4Life at 01:31
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